Text: James 3:1-12 Title: 
WHAT WORDS CAN DO

What does this say?
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We all have access to a powerful weapon that can be used in any
situation to make things better or to make things worse: our words.
Anyone with the ability to say the right thing at the right time--or to
keep from saying the wrong thing at the wrong time--will find themselves
successful in all areas of life, including their business and personal
relationships.
The Bible warns us that it is impossible to have complete control over
our tongue--it says "no man can tame the tongue" (James 3:8)--but the
Bible also offers a great deal of advice on how we can manage our tongue
and speak in such a way that our conversations give glory to God.
Today, we 're going to look at ways we can become better at managing the
things we say. We're going to discover that changing our words can
literally change our lives. As we examine James 3, there are four things
I want you to notice. First of all...
1. Be aware of the damage you can cause with words. One of the biggest
lies children are told is that "sticks and stones may break your bones,
but words will never hurt you." I was told that when I was younger, and
I always wondered why, if that were true, words hurt so much!
When I was ten I cut my leg open, jumping in a pile of leaves in the
backyard. When I was 14 I busted my lip open doing a flip on the
trampoline. Both of these were painful experiences and required an
emergency room visit and stitches, but as I look back on them I don't
remember what the pain felt like. However, there are other scenes from
my childhood that when they are recalled, the pain of the moment remains
fresh, even after all these years.
The words we say create most of the problems we face. Most problems at
church or in the workplace are the result of words. Most divorces are
not caused by infidelity or desertion--they are caused by words. Most
conflicts between parents and children are not the result of some
generation gap--they're the result of words. I've known parents who
spent 16 years speaking harshly to their children, constantly putting
them down, and then they wonder why their teenager suddenly has so much
hostility!
We need to remember that our words carry tremendous weight, and they can
cause enormous damage. The Bible says, "Reckless words pierce like a
sword..." (Proverbs 12:18) This is exactly what James means when he says
in verse 6, "The tongue is a fire." We must be mindful of the fact that
our words are weapons; they have the power to destroy. Also, we must
remember...
2. Words cannot be taken back. When you were a kid, did you ever say
something that you had to take back? Words, once spoken, can never be
taken back.
I read an article a pastor had written about an experience he had on a
return flight home. He was flying from El Paso to San Jose on
Southwestern, which allows passengers to select their seat on a
first-come first-served basis. The flight was full, and an attractive
young couple was unable to find two seats together. There was a vacant
seat next to him and a vacant seat in front of him. Generously, he
offered to take the empty seat in front of him, so they could have his
seat and the empty one next to it. They thanked him and they each
squeezed into their new seats. Less than 30 seconds after they sat down,
he realized he had made a mistake. The two people were not the happy
couple they appeared to be. Apparently they had been in an argument all
morning, which they resumed as soon as they sat down--and he couldn't
help but hear it. He never quite figured out what the argument was
about, but it stemmed from the fact that she had said something he
didn't like. And now they were going round and round about it. She would
say, "But I didn't mean it." He would say, "But you said it." She would
say, "But I take it back." He would say, "You can't take it back. That's
how you really feel." She would say, "I wasn't thinking. I was really
mad." He would say, "It doesn't matter if you were mad. You still said
it." On and on this went, across Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, and
California. No one had an idea what it was she said, but the suspicion
was that she would never be allowed to forget she said it! Now,
obviously this man could learn a lesson in forgiveness. I'm not taking
sides in their argument, but I am saying this: We will save ourselves a
great deal of trouble if we resist saying something mean-spirited in the
heat of anger, because the fact is once words are spoken, they can't be
taken back! Thirdly, we must remember that...
3. Your words reveal much about you.
Jesus said, "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks."
(Matthew 12:34) He is saying that whatever is in your heart eventually
comes out of your mouth. If your heart is critical and cold and bitter,
your words will be, too. James says... (v. 12) Can a fig tree bear
olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce
fresh water.
A. Our words reveal our physical character. When we travel different
places, from time to time people will ask, "What part of the country are
you from?" He wasn't aware of his accent, but every time he spoke he
revealed it to others.
B. Our words reveal our spiritual character. Just as your accent reveals
where you are from, your words reveal the state of your heart. Listen to
this...A fool is consumed by his own lips. At the beginning his words
are folly; at the end they are wicked madness--and the fool multiplies
his words. (Ecclesiastes 10:12-14)
Our words betray us! We must remember that they reveal our true
character. "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks!"
But there is a twist to how this can be applied to our lives. The Bible
teaches that your words reveal your character, and it also teaches...
4. Changing your character begin with changing your words. (v. 2) If
anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to
keep his whole body in check.
Do you have trouble with besetting sin? Do you want to be a better
person...a better Christian? The Bible tells us that in order to do
that, we must start with our tongue. He who guards his mouth and his
tongue keeps himself from calamity. (Proverbs 21:23)
Psychologists say that if you will change the words you use to describe
your emotions, you can change the way you feel. If, instead of saying "I
am furious with you," you say, "I'm a little annoyed," you will be
better able to control your anger! That seems so simplistic--too easy to
be true. But it's worth a try. I know, because it has worked for me.
Using softer words to communicate anger not only helps you control your
emotions, it helps the other person control theirs. Which do you think
is more effective--saying to someone "I'm a little annoyed" or saying "I
AM SO MAD, YOU STUPID IDIOT"? The answer is obvious. You have better
chances of salvaging the situation if you use softer language. Changing
your character begins with changing your words. James said... If anyone
considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his
tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. (James 1:26)
The phrase "keeping a tight reign on your tongue" comes down to a rather
simple formula:
1. Decrease the number of bad things you say.
2. Increase the number of good things you say.
Remember, though, that James warns us "no one can tame the tongue." If
and when we fail, we don't need to beat ourselves up, we just need to
keep trying! Charles Tremendous Jones challenges people to "say
something positive about everything all the time." That's a big
challenge, but worthy of our effort.
Conclusion
We have the potential to do great good with our words, or great harm.
They are powerful weapons. That potential good and that potential harm
are not only directed at others, but at ourselves. Our spiritual health
is determined to a great extent by the words we say. The Bible says...
Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil
and his lips from deceitful speech? (1 Peter 3:10)
The message from God's word is so plain: change your words, and you can
change your life. Can it be that simple? Yes, it really can.
If you want to make your witness more gracious, or more winsome, start
with your speech. Don't worry when folks can't guess what part of the
country you're from. It's when they would never guess you are a
Christian that you've got something to worry about!